Saturday, April 13, 2013

A Proposal: The 2012-13 Winter Storm Names


We had a dusting of snow Friday, very possibly the last snow of the winter. After an average start, we had a pretty wild winter snow-wise, highlighted in the mist of things by Winter Storm Nemo. There was a lot of flak about the naming of Nemo. People felt it was corny to name winter storms.

Being the contrarian that I am, I disagree. It's no more corny than naming hurricanes. But there's a reason we name hurricanes -- it's easier to identify them for historical purposes. And it's just as legitimate to do so for blizzards and nor'easters. It's a pain in the ass to look up Northeastern Blizzard of 2009 on Wikipedia and find yourself redirected to a storm that primarily affected the mid-Atlantic states.

My issue with the naming of Nemo was in the name. Nemo? Really? What a wuss. When I think of Nemo I think of a cartoon clownfish. If you're going to name winter storms, give them badass names.

Therefore, I've gone through the trouble of coming up with an alphabet of winter storm names, so that we don't have to be subjected to horrible naming decisions next winter. So here we go

Winter storm:

Aerosmith
Belichick
Chupacabra
Dystopia
Ebola
Freddy Krueger
Godzilla
Hannibal
Ice-nine
Jersey Devil
Khan
Leatherface
Megalodon
Napoleon
Ogopogo
Panther
Quetzalcoatlus
Rabies
Sasquatch
Tyrannosaurus
Ulysses
Vlad the Impaler
Wikipedia
Xerxes
Yeti
Zeus

You're welcome. See you next winter.

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