Consumption

"I once had a roommate who loved to hear himself talk. And, living in the same dwelling as him, that resulted in me sitting on the sofa on a nightly basis, tortured by having to listen to him talk my ear off about everything to the latest episode of Royal Pains to the Patriots’ defensive woes to his psycho ex-girlfriend’s plot to ruin his life. Most of the time I would pretend I was listening and nod accordingly. Still, I have to admit that every once in awhile he would say something that was actually quite profound, and I file away those rare nuggets to this day as proverbial 'words of wisdom.'"

n  Opening from a paper I turned in for a novel-writing class I took this past summer.

The topic of that paper is immaterial for this blog. The roommate in question was someone I lived with last year. He was mostly a good guy. I always felt like he just needed a break or two. And he did indeed have some moments where he would say something that brought some clarity to our crazy world. I’ve been told I’m a good listener, that I should’ve become a therapist, and I think the fact that I listened (even when I didn't always want to) caused him to take a liking to me.

Except that the ex-girlfriend’s plot to ruin his life became all-consuming, to the point where they would be at our place every night, fighting until the police would arrive. And then there was the day when he screamed at me for something ridiculously minor (getting him the wrong flavor of tea from McDonald’s). Whether he needed a break in life or not, I didn’t have to put up with mental abuse for any reason, let alone something as meaningless as tea. One instance was enough to me.

So even though I liked the place I lived in, I felt I had no choice but to move. But I always in the back of my mind wondered how he was doing, if he found a way to right the ship.

I recently found out that a couple of months ago he committed suicide.

We all have our problem and challenges we have to overcome in life. I certainly have mine. I feel like this is a lesson for me not to let my problems consume me. There’s always a silver lining, as long as you don’t sabotage yourself.