I got so wound up with Thanksgiving
that I forgot to see how I did last week. The answer: 9-7. Would’ve been a
much-better-sounding 10-6 if the Browns hadn’t imploded at the end of Monday
night. Oh well.
This week’s picks:
Green
Bay 40, Detroit 10 – Lions can’t really sweep the
Packers, can they?
Houston
24, Buffalo 21 – JJ Watt has more sacks than the
Buffalo front seven combined. Yeah, but Rex Ryan has a bigger mouth than the
entire population of Houston combined.
Chicago
13, San Francisco 3 – Bears
sneaking into the playoff picture. And I didn’t burst out laughing when I typed
that.
Cincinnati
24, Cleveland 6 – LAST WEEK: Browns attempt field goal
on the last play of a tie game. RESULT: Field goal attempt blocked by Ravens
and run back for game-winning touchdown. THIS WEEK: Browns coach Mike Pettine
attempts to light Christmas tree at team headquarters, sets Browns’ facility on
fire.
Miami
28, Baltimore 13 – Remember six weeks ago when
everybody was like, “Wow, Dan Campbell really turned this Dolphins team around?”
Seattle
41, Minnesota 20 – There’s always one game every week
where I’m like, “Why am I picking this team to win?” This week, this is the
game.
N.Y.
Giants 41, N.Y. Jets 28 – Giants and
Jets playing just the way I like them to play: with both teams in danger of fading
from playoff contention.
Arizona
19, St. Louis 6 – Bruce Arians on the Rams: “I’ll have
dinner with ‘em, but I ain’t liking ‘em.” Wait….what?
Atlanta
28, Tampa Bay 24 – I’m giving the Falcons one last
chance before I give up on them for the season.
Tennessee
17, Jacksonville 6 – I’m giving the Titans one last
chance to play like an NFL team before I give up on them for the season.
Kansas
City 20, Oakland 13 – I feel
like Chiefs are due for a letdown. If I hadn’t already picked the Seahawks to beat
the Vikings, this would be “that game.”
Denver
20, San Diego 17 – I mean, any quarterback would look
like Peyton Manning if they get every holding call, even the ones that don’t exist.
New
England 31, Philadelphia 28 – Referee
Pete Morelli and his crew was demoted after a poor performance last week, and
reassigned from the Sunday night Indianapolis-Pittsburgh game to this one. That’s
like impeaching Richard Nixon and reassigning him to governor of Massachusetts.
New
Orleans 32, Carolina 21 – Saints suck,
but for some reason I feel like they have the best chance to knock Carolina
from the ranks of the undefeated.
Pittsburgh
26, Indianapolis 7 – I mean, Matt Hasselbeck has to lose
a game sometime, right?
Washington
27, Dallas 20 – Redskins playing a meaningful game
with playoff implications against a weak opponent. So they’ll probably lose.
LAST
WEEK: 9-7
2015 TO DATE: 101-75
2014 AFTER WEEK 12: 118-58
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