Friday, September 6, 2013

2013 NFC Predictions

.....continuing on with the NFL season predictions (way to defend your crown, Ravens, you jerkbones).

1) NEW YORK GIANTS (8-8) -- Every year the Giants either go 8-8 or win the Super Bowl. I'm banking that they're going to achieve a happy medium this year.
2) Washington Redskins (8-8) -- I'm picking a three-way tie for the division lead, with the Giants winning some silly tiebreaker like net touchdowns in division games. Do any of the so-called experts predict that? Hell no. I'm nothing if not unique.
3) Dallas Cowboys (8-8) -- It wouldn't be the NFL unless Tony Romo lost the final game of the regular season with a playoff berth on the line.
4) Philadelphia Eagles (6-10) -- Also, I'm predicting Riley Cooper won't win the team's 12th man award.

1) GREEN BAY PACKERS (14-2) -- While they will miss the Madden exploits of Greg Jennings running 99 yards for a touchdown on a broken leg, I still think the Packers are the class of the division.
2) CHICAGO BEARS (11-5) -- This prediction only holds true if everyone stops stealing Jay Cutler's stuff. Otherwise, the Bears win 2 games.
3) Detroit Lions (8-8) -- On offense, Matthew Stafford will throw every play of the 2013 season to Calvin Johnson, complete 50% of them for TDs, and the other 50% will be intercepted.
4) Minnesota Vikings (7-9) -- Things will go well this season for the Vikes until teams come up with a new wrinkle -- the 11-man defensive line -- to stop Adrian Peterson in his tracks.

NFC SOUTH -- (I don't want to say anything inflammatory to provide bulletin board material for these teams, since this is the NFC division that plays the Pats this year, so this section will be commentary-less)
3) New Orleans Saints (7-9)
4) Carolina Panthers (6-10)

1) SEATTLE SEAHAWKS (11-5) -- Yep, Pete Carroll is pumped and jacked again.
2) San Francisco 49ers (8-8) -- Jim Harbaugh blows a gasket on the sidelines in a game this year and becomes the first coach in NFL history to be assessed a technical foul.
3) St. Louis Rams (7-9) -- The Rams are due to finally improve to slightly-below-average.
4) Arizona Cardinals (2-14) -- Remember when the replacement refs officiated year and the Cardinals started 4-0? Yeah, neither do I.

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