After an off-week in which I went 8-8, I bounced back and went 13-3 last week.
Anyway, let's just get this over with. This week's picks:
Cardinals 30, Rams 28 -- Arizona's slumping; Rams have shut out two consecutive opponents. So of course those trends are due to reverse themselves.
Falcons 57, Steelers 33 -- The last three matchups between these two teams have gone to overtime, with each team winning once and the third game ending in a tie. As for the 2014 edition, we've got a team (Pittsburgh) coming off a gut-check win over Cincinnati but also has the AFC North's only two losses against the NFC South, and a team (Atlanta) that is 5-8 but tied for the division lead and playing better of late. Who the hell knows?
Ravens 27, Jaguars 7 -- Jacksonville is dead last in the NFL in point differential in 2014 (-157). Baltimore, despite being on the outside of the playoff picture as of now, is third (+101). This has the makings of an ugly game.
Packers 29, Bills 20 -- Nice bounceback season for Buffalo but it's starting to look like the party's over.
Buccaneers 24, Panthers 0 -- Cam Newton misses opening day game against Tampa Bay, gets into car accident this week and looks to be out again Sunday. Looks like someone's too scared to play the 2-11 Buccaneers....
Bengals 23, Browns 20 -- I think I speak for all of America when I say that I hope Johnny Manziel's first start for the Browns is an absolute trainwreck.
Colts 29, Texans 17 -- Roger Gooddell catching shit again: nothing in the NFL's new personal conduct policy would force Andrew Luck to shave his beard.
Chiefs 29, Raiders 23 -- Oakland trying really hard to piss away the first pick in 2015 draft.
Patriots 21, Dolphins 0 -- Got a little nervous when I picked New England to win 45-7 last week and Chargers got off to a 14-3 lead. Hopefully Patriots take care of business and clinch AFC East.
Giants 20, Redskins 7 -- Giants suck, but they have a way of running off streaks (lose 2, win 3, lose 7, win 4). Redskins just flat-out lose.
Broncos 48, Chargers 20 -- Would love to see San Diego pull the upset here. Would also love to see a scantily clad Jennifer Lawrence fall through my bedroom ceiling.
Jets 35, Titans 10 -- There are five teams currently tied with the league's worst record at 2-11 and two of them are featured here. Hence, the outcome of this game will send shockwaves across the league, just like Geno Smith did when he said he's "flashed Pro Bowl potential" this year.
Lions 34, Vikings 28 -- Detroit offense so disappointing this year, team will be referred to for the rest of the year as "Detroit Lions Featuring Calvin Johnson."
Seahawks 40, 49ers 21 -- Let's face it: Jim Harbaugh has pretty much quit on the 49ers.
Eagles 30, Cowboys 27 -- After watching Mark Sanchez play for Philadelphia this year, Geno Smith probably can't wait to leave the Jets so he can latch on with another team and actually play well.
Saints 27, Bears 24 -- Here's how bad the NFC South is: if the Bears were in the NFC South, this game would be for the division lead.
LAST WEEK -- 13-3
SEASON TO DATE -- 139-68-1